Pass the Note
by AsianTwinkiesFTW
Summary: Remus, James, and Sirius pass notes to each other. Contains revenge and Remus forced into a dress. Oh dear, let the insanity begin. Rated T for extreme craziness! Used to be called "Taking Notes"
1. Forced into a dress

**WOOT! IT'S TIME FOR NOTES!**

**DISCLAIMER: I don't own HP… but one can dream…**

*

**Sirius**

James

_Remus_

*

**James?**

Yes, Padfoot?

**You need help. Now.**

Whatever _do_ you mean?

_James, you've been staring at Lily for the past THREE HOURS. It doesn't help that you're drooling._

**How the **_**hell**_** do you stare at the **_**same**_** person for THREE HOURS?**

_Don't ask me, Pads. I'm just amazed that he stared at her even when he was walking in the corridors to his next class._

Hey! It's not my fault that we've got nearly all the same classes!

**Yes, but it is your fault you're becoming a stalker.**

_And it's your fault Lily's thinking of getting a restraining order._

What?! How do you know this, Moony ol' pal?!

_Ahem. We're prefects. We meet up. We have patrolling duties together. Not to mention we're friends._

**Ha, Prongs! Moony's closer to Lily that you!**

Traitor! Back-stabbing no good—

_Stop _right_ there, James. *sigh* Lily and I are _just_ friends, alright? There is _nothing_ going on between us. Nothing._

How do I know you're not lying to me?! SPEAK UP, REMUS LUPIN, DAMMIT!

**Prongs, do you really think Lily would go out with Remus before y… oh. Wait. Of course she would.**

_You're not helping, Padfoot._

**Yes, I know.**

_Mr. Moony would like to tell Mr. Padfoot that Mr. Prongs looks like he will kill Mr. Moony in his sleep._

**Mr. Padfoot would like to remind Mr. Moony that he should arm himself with an arsenal of spells.**

_You know, James. If you kill me, Lily will never go out with you. She considers me one of her closest friends._

She does, does she?

_Yes._

Then can you ask her something for me?

_And that something would be… oh. Oh, no James. You already know what she's going to say._

Come on, Moons! Please?

_Did you just say 'please'?_

Yes.

_My God, who are you and what have you done with James?_

I _do_ have manners sometimes, Moony.

**Well you sure don't show it.**

Shut up, Padfoot.

_Guys, stow away your parchments. Minnie's getting suspicious of your 'vigorous note-taking'._

**Right-o.**

Alright.

* * *

[The next day during Prof. Binn's class]

_I hate you all._

**Geez, Remus. Just because we did **_**one**_** small thing—**

_FORCING ME INTO A DRESS WHILE I WAS UNCONSCIOUS THEN TOSSING ME OFF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER IS __NOT__ A SMALL THING! I COULD HAVE _DIED_, YOU MORONS!_

But you didn't.

**Yeah, Remus. We put a Cushioning Charm at the bottom of the drop to make s—**

_THAT IS NOT THE POINT! YOU. FORCED. ME. INTO. A __DRESS__! THIS. MEANS. _WAR_!_

**Prongs, my friend.**

Yes, Padfoot ol' buddy?

**Should we be scared?**

Yes. Yes we should.

* * *

**A/N:** Ahem, yes. Well. I know it's short. 8D But bear with me people. 8D I'm new to the whole Marauders-write-Notes plot. 8D

Trust me. It gets better.

NEXT TIME ON _TAKING NOTES_!

Remus exacts his revenge on our two Animagi. 8D


	2. Remus's Revenge

**You know the drill. I own nothing 'cept the plot.**

* * *

**James, I'm scared.**

Of what?

**Not what. Who.**

Well then, who?

**Remus. **

Oh. Which Remus? Remus Lupin or Remus Diggles?

**LOL. Diggles… **

Ahem. You were saying…?

**Oh. Yeah. I'm afraid of Remus. Remus J. Lupin. Remus with the 'furry little problem'. Remus who was usually the mastermind behind all our pranks. That Remus.**

Oh. _That_ Remus.

**I wish he'd just get the whole 'revenge' thing over and done with.**

But we kinda did throw him off the Astr—

**THAT'S NOT THE POINT! THE POINT IS… well it was funny…**

Yeah… I totally LOL-d…

**Yeah… xD**

Hilarious that was.

_What are you talking about?_

Nothing, Moony, ol' pal.

… _you were talking about me._

**No we weren't.**

_I can read, Padfoot._

Dammit. Foiled again.

_And for your information… My revenge is going along well._

**Remus, bu-dday, let by-gones be by-g—**

_YOU FLUNG ME OFF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER!_

**We were DRUNK, Remus!**

_THAT GIVES YOU NO EXCUSE TO FORCE ME INTO A DRESS—_

—**while you were out from alchohol consummation—**

—_AND THROW ME OFF THE ASTRONOMY TOWER FOR YOUR AMUSEMENT!_

Hey! We can't take all of the blame! Peter was there too!

_Yes, but Peter was conked out._

… **and he gave you an offering of chocolate.**

_Yes, well… it was a _lot_ of good chocolate…_

Come on, Moony. Plus, you weren't even conscious when we threw you off the tower!

**Yeah! And you didn't even get hurt!**

_But. You. Forced. Me. Into. A. Dress._

Yeah, so?

_You. Took. Off. My. Clothes. And. Forced. Me. Into. Your. Aunt's. Dress._

**And…?**

_Wouldn't you be… oh, I don't know… slightly bothered that your supposed 'friends' undressed you while you were UNCONSIOUS?_

**Oh.**

Damn.

_WHAT IF SOMEONE WALKED INTO THE ROOM WHILE YOU WERE DOING THAT?!_

**Oh.**

Well if you put it that way…

_*seething in fury* Which is why I've decided to give you a dose of your own medicine. Au revoir, my friends. _

**What do you—GOOD LORD!**

REMUS! REMUS GET BACK HERE! Oh no, Lily's laughing at me!

**This is just cruel, Remus.**

_I know._

**Are you… cackling?**

I think he is.

**We can't tell over their laughter.**

It is time for retaliation.

**Agreed.**

We plan our attack tonight.

* * *

"Remus."

"Yes, Sirius?"

"You made me and James wear dresses for a week."

"And?"

"We've decided to retaliate."

"So?"

"JAMES!"

"What are you calling Ja—Oh. Good Lord. No. I am not going to—Sirius! NO! LET _GO_ OF ME SIRIUS! I'M GOING TO _KILL_ YOU! NO! I WILL NO—_HELL_ NO! GET _AWAY_ FROM ME! PETER! LILY! SOMEONE! _SAVE_ ME!"

* * *

**A/N: **So. Two chapters in less than an hour. This's got to be a record. 8D

NEXT TIME!

What happened to Remus?


	3. The Great Prank War of '75

**Oh come on, of course I don't own HP! *glare***

**(If I did, it'd be much more hilarious… and much more Marauder-y, and SIRIUS WOULD NOT BE DEAD! *wail*)**

* * *

… _did I mention how much I hate you both?_

Yes, I think you've established that.

**We did good, Prongs.**

_YOU DID GOOD? YOU THINK THAT WAS GOOD?!_

**Well what do you think?**

_I think you've both gone so far 'round the bend you can see yourselves._

That hurts Moony. That hurts right here.

**You wound me, my love!**

_Sirius?_

**Yes?**

_Shut up._

**Once again, I say: YOU WOUND ME!**

_That was the point._

**Yeesh, what made YOU so snappy?**

_Oh, I don't know… it could be the small fact that the both of you TURNED ME INTO A FREAKING GIRL!!_

Oh yeah… that was hilarious.

**I don't even remember how we did it. xD**

_You… but… YOU FORCE FED ME POTION! *fuming*_

**Ohh… yeaaah… I forgot. xD**

We're sooo awesome.

**Totally.**

_Just so you know, I'm going to make sure that you never rest again. Ever._

D'you know what he's going to do?

**Please. We all know he's a loose cannon.**

_*cough* I'm _what_?_

**Um… the… er… uh…**

_THOUGHT so._

* * *

[2 months later]

**Guys, can we stop this feud already?**

_Why? James deserves what he gets. Seriously._

Hey, it's not my fault Remus won't surrender!

_ME? ME?! It's YOU who should surrender!_

**Guys, seriously. Even I think this is getting ridiculous.**

_*glare* Oh really?_

What makes you think THAT? *glare*

**It's just the fact that every single person/creature/professor/living being is afraid of taking/moving/eating/etc for the fear that they're going to be a victim of a prank. Example Given: ME.**

_Ah, yeah. Sorry about the whole 'Levicorpus-Flipped-Upside-Down-In-A-Chicken-Suit' thing. ;D_

***glare***

Oh, and sorry for the… 'midnight swim' in the Black Lake while covered in the Giant Squid's favorite treat. xD

**GUYS! *super glare***

Alright, alright, Pads.

_Fine… killjoy._

**KILLJOY?! I'M AFRAID FOR MY SANITY AND HEALTH!!**

_Yeesh. Fine. So. Prongs. Truce?_

Truce.

_Do you hereby swear to stop the Great Prank War of '75?_

Agreed.

_We'll shake on it later._

Fine.

**THANK MERLIN!!**

* * *

[Dialogue, still during the same Class, Binns]

"WE'RE SAVED! THEY'VE DECIDED TO MAKE PEACE!" shouted Sirius during the middle of one of Binn's lectures on the Great Goblin Rebellion.

Everyone got out of their seats and cheered, screaming: "WE'RE SAVED!" "FREEDOM! FREEDOM!" "WE'RE SAFE!"

Remus and James stared at them all incredulously.

"We weren't _that_ bad, were we?" said James, rolling his eyes.

Everyone stopped to stare at James as if he'd sprouted a third arm.

"I think it's safe to say you guys were a force to reckon with. Even Evans was intimidated, James." Said Sirius matter-of-factly.

"Lily?" said James, perking up.

"Oh, dear Merlin, ARE YOU INSANE, SIRIUS?! THIS'S JUST GOING TO MAKE—"

"Does that mean Evans liked it?" said James, the Gleam entering his eyes. Everyone slowly backed away from James.

"—HIM CAUSE _MORE_ MAYHEM AND CHAOS!" shouted Remus over James's inquiry, shaking Sirius shoulders like a rag-doll.

"SWEET BLOODY MERLIN!" shouted Sirius, smacking himself in the head just as the bell rang. "EVERYONE, RUN!"

They needed no more incentive.

They ran.

* * *

**A/N:** Ah, another chapter, more insanity. 8D

NEXT TIME!

James goes crazy. O__O


	4. Stuck with Binns and Relationships

**I don't own NUTHIN! … 'cept the plot. 8D**

* * *

**Good God…**

_This is YOUR entire fault you know._

**Wha—How—HOW DO YOU FIGURE **_**THAT**_**?**

_Well let's see… 1. You made James realize that Lily was impressed by the scale of our pranks. 2. Because you did that, James has decided to go ALL-OUT CRAZY on Hogwarts. 3. That is why we are currently STUCK in Proff. Binn's class because James decided to 'Colloportus' the door right after he left._

**Hey, not my fault the man's a genius.**

_You do realize that we're ALL going to be LATE to PROFESSOR MCGONAGALL'S class?_

… **no… James wouldn't do **_**that**_**…**

_Notice the bell that just rang._

… **JAMES! GET YOUR SORRY ASS OVER HERE! JAMES!**

_He probably can't even hear us right n—_

What?

… _I stand corrected._

Huh?

**Ahem. If you haven't noticed, Prongs ol' buddy o' mine, we're stuck in the most boring-as-hell class EVER.**

Not my fault you guys are—what?

_Lily's stuck in here too._

OH MY GOD, ARE YOU SERIOUS?!

**No, I'm—**

_Finish that sentence, and you die._

—**going to kill you James if you don't get us out of here!**

_That's better. Oh, and James, I suggest getting here in the next five seconds. Lily looks like she's going to blow her top._

… **James…? Are you—hot **_**DAMN**_** that was fast.**

_Points to you, James for getting here in… 0.01 seconds._

* * *

[Dialogue, same class, Binns]

"Geez, James. Took you for-EVER to get here!"

"Shut _up_, Sirius, and _move_ your ass _out_ the door _before_ I get James here to _Transfigure_ you into a rubber _chicken_."

"Ooh, touchy, touchy, Re—"

"JUST MOVE YOUR ASS OUT THE DOOR, DAMMIT!"

"Alright! I'm moving! I'm moving!"

* * *

[Charms]

_Hello all._

What's up, Moons?

**Yeah what's u—MERLIN'S BEARD WORMS, WATCH WHERE YOU'RE SWINGING THAT THING!**

S-Sorry, P-Padfoot…

_How are you stuttering when you write on your Parchment[1]?_

I d-don't kn-know…

**Yeah, yeah, whatever. But if you're going to VANISH a cat, I suggest you VANISH it by MAGIC, not by THROWING around the ROOM and hitting poor Padfoots in the HEAD!**

Now_ who's touchy?_

**Shut up, Moony.**

_*rolls eyes*_

**I can see you, Moony.**

_*le gasp* Are you admiring my looks? Why Padfoot, I didn't know you cared._

**Shut UP, Moony.**

_Ha! That's no way to treat the object of your affection!_

**Object of affe—are you CRAZY? I'm not a poof!**

_My sources say otherwise._

**You source—WHAT?**

_Nothing, nothing…_

… **this conversation isn't over.**

_Oh yes it is. I said so._

… **I hate it when you use your intelligence.**

_Whatever._

**So what's this I hear about you and Jean Witherspoon?**

_Yeah we're going out. So?_

**What happened to Shawnie?**

_She became one of Them._

**Sweet Merlin, ol' buddy, how did you escape the witch's clutches?**

_Simple. I kissed Jean._

**Oh. **

_Sometimes I think They go crazy._

**You THINK?**

_Shut up, Sirius. Besides, class is over._

**Thank Merlin. Peter's Flying Cat was getting on my nerves.**

* * *

[Dialogue, end of class, Flitwick]

Remus laughed as he walked out of the classroom, while Sirius smirked.

Peter just wondered why Remus would laugh at him whenever he looked at him.

* * *

**A/N:** WHOO! 8D

[1] - They used the _Papel Telepathica_ spell

NEXT TIME!

Sirius and Remus have had ENOUGH of James' antics.


	5. Remus and Sirius's Plan: In Effect

**Ahem. The responses to this fic have made me feel… warm and tingly inside. :D**

**Thank you all! ('specially for the laughter. Laughter and happy reviews fuel my writing!)**

**So thank you to all of my reviewers:**

**-14hp1**

**-Krissyy**

**-FallenChloey**

**-Alice-rox-ur-sox**

**-RaNdOmGeEk**

**-EOshipper2010**

**-jessicats**

**Thank you all for reviewing! NOW NO MORE OF THIS SAPPY-HAPPY HUGGY-WUFFY (… FTW) STUFF! ONTO THE FIC! 8D**

… ***sniff* I've only gotten **_**ONE BLOODY REVIEW**_** for the past two months…**

**Well for you, Krissyy I shall continue! *GLOMP***

**Disclaimer: I don't own it. DUH.**

* * *

[TWO DAYS AFTER THE FULL MOON]

[Prof. Flitwick's Class: Charms]

**Remus? You there?**

_Bluuh… what is it Siri?_

… **you okay?**

_No. I'm _not_ okay, dammit. I feel like someone's inside my skull trying to break out with a _pickaxe_, my entire body is sore and _bruised_, and JAMES WILL _NOT_ SHUT UP!_

… **O_O;;**

_*sigh* So. _Before_ I crack, what is it?_

**Uh… well yesterday night before we all went to sleep you said we were going to plot—**

—_not here, Siri! He might see!_

—_**Severus's**_** demise…**

[To Sirius, PrivateChat™ invite: Accept?]

[PrivateChat™ invite accepted by: Sirius Black]

_Nice save back there._

**Thanks, Moons. Bloody amazing idea to create the PrivateChat™ option, though.**

_Why _thank_ you. Anyways. Continue._

***clears throat* Commence Conversation: Get-Rid-Of-James'-Plotting-and-Pranking-of-People-Including-the-Other-Marauders, or: G.R.O.J.P.O.P.O.P.I.T.O.M.!**

… _or you know, we can just call it "Jane". ;D Much less suspicious._

**I knew there was a reason you were the smart one.**

_So. We know that James is trying to do this to impress Lily—_

—**which somehow makes sense in his twisted little mind—**

—thank_ you Sirius for the obvious observation. Anyways, he's '_trying'_ to impress Lily. (key word, __trying__. ;D)_

_**LOL**_** Rems. XD**

_I have contact with the said redhead, so here's what I propose: We get her to talk/smack James in the face while shouting how he's so immature or other bull like that._

… **no retaliation? No **_**pranking?**_

_Nope._

**B-B-But…**

_NO, Pads._

***sigh* Fine.**

_Pranking later. ;D_

_**YES! **_**XD**

[Remus Lupin has left PrivateChat™]

[Sirius Black has left PrivateChat™]

[PrivateChat™ terminated]

* * *

[Later that night: After Dinner: In the Hallways: Remus, Sirius, Lily]

Lily, Sirius, and Remus stood in the Entrance Hall with Lily next to the doors of the Great Hall. Lily stood in front of Sirius, with Remus standing to her left, closest to the door to the Great Hall. Sirius leaned against the wall, arms crossed. Lily broke the silence.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" asked Lily, arms crossed and looking at Sirius in a 'I can't believe I'm doing this' sort of way.

Sirius said casually, ignoring the look, "You know of James' anti—"

"JAMES POTTER! DETENTION!"

"—cs?" finished Sirius, too used to the shouts of "DETENTION!" from McGonagall to care anymore.

Remus and Lily too had grown an immunity.

"Of course I do!" said Lily in disgust. "The things he's done… despicable."

Remus and Sirius shared a smirk.

"Well we were hoping you'd say that," said Remus, smiling at Lily. Lily returned the smile.

"Oh?" she said, curious.

"You see," said Sirius, causing their attention to turn to him, "James is doing all of this for you."

"For me?" said Lily, rolling her eyes in false shock. "Oh what a surprise."

The three snickered.

"Ahem. Yes. Well," continued Remus. "We're asking you to help us stop it."

"Hmm?" said Lily.

"We need you to smack some sense into the man!" finished Sirius.

"Literally or figuratively. Your pick," said Remus, grinning.

Lily's face broke into a huge smile.

"I'm in. What do I have to do?"

* * *

[After Transfiguration]

"POTTER!" shouted Lily as James was about to leave the classroom.

James turned around and faced Lily with rising trepidation. What did he do wrong? ((A/N: as if you don't know… *eye roll*))

The two were the only ones left inside the classroom as Prof. McG'd already gone to lunch.

Her flaming hair flowed behind her making her look like a goddess of war. James got even more anxious.

"Potter, I am sick and _tired_ of waking up every day and finding that our Gryffindor House Points have gone down to an even lower number even more no matter how hard we—the other Gryffindors—try to raise them! I swear to Merlin if you _don't_ stop I'm going to have to take some drastic measures!" she snarled, jabbing a finger at his chest.

James smirked. "But Lily-Flower, all of this is for you!"

"I know!" she shrieked, eyes wild and flashing in anger. "_That's_ what sickens me the most!"

"W-What?" said James, eyes widening behind his glasses.

"I can't _believe_ that somewhere in that twisted and crazy little head of yours you'd think that I'd be even _remotely_ attracted to such immaturity!" she said, throwing up her hands and crossing her arms as she glared at him again. "I am a _Prefect_, Mr. Potter, and it falls into my job category to stop such nonsense from ever happening in the hallowed halls of Hogwarts! But you _constantly_ undermine my authority _and_ Remus'! And yet you wonder _why_ I don't like you?" she stopped to laugh humorlessly. "_HA! _As if I would _ever_ subject myself to ever like someone like _YOU!"_

She glared at him, picked up her bag, and walked towards the door. Stopping at the doorway, she stopped, and turned around swiftly. James stayed standing where he was, not even looking behind him.

"I suggest you stop your childlike actions, Mr. Potter before you get suspended. Or worse: _expelled_," she spat, then turning quickly on her heel, stomped out the door way towards the Great Hall for lunch.

James Potter stood inside the Transfigurations classroom, thinking deeply. Her words had really shone a new light on him.

So it was, on a Tuesday in the year 1975, James Potter changed his ways.

* * *

**CHAPTER… five? DONE! 8D**

I thought about stopping here, but…

… two more years, aye? ;D

You know, this gives this story some PLOT. O___O

Anyways. This chapter is the one I am most proud of. *pats self on back* Good job, Revenge. Good Job. ;D

Please, Review! 8D

-Revenge


	6. Prongs, WTF

**I live, people. I LIVE! :D**

**Sorry. School + summer vacation = forgetting about this. Doesn't help that I discovered Hetalia. XD**

**But I re-read this and man. WTF WAS I ON. ._.**

**So yeah.**

**Here we go!**

* * *

**Disclaimer: D: I wish I owned Harry Potter. **

**Note: Year 6 begins now.**

**Don't kill me plz. D8**

* * *

**Sirius**

_Remus_

James

* * *

I am going to woo Lily and this year she will be mine!

_Cue count of how many time he's said that._

**3,452,336,742.**

You guys keep count?

_It got tiring after 1,254,905,283__rd__ time, James._

**What were we supposed to do? Actually LISTEN to you?**

That hurts, Pads. That really does.

_Speaking of pain, here comes Lily now._

* * *

[Study Session – Prof. Binn's class]

"Hi Lily," said James, smiling.

"… Hello Potter," she said suspiciously.

Remus and Sirius got out the Book of James' Attempts on Wooing Lily From Year One and opened the incredibly thick book. Remus got out a quill and dipped it in Sirius' inkwell.

"You're looking pretty as usual," he said, flashing a grin. Lily's eyes widened in shock, cheeks blushing. Remus almost dropped his quill and Sirius choked on his spit.

"Th-thank you, P-potter. Good day," she said abruptly, and left. James watched her go with longing eyes.

Sirius smacked him upside the head. "Hello? Anyone there? Please respond. James Potter, please return to Planet Hogwarts."

James absently massaged his head. "Wow…"

Remus tossed James his parchment as Mr. Binns looked up.

* * *

_WTF. What just went down?_

**That's what I'd like to know, my good Mr. Moony. Mr. Prongs, please FESS UP.**

I said I would change, and I did.

Guys, what just h-happened?

_Good job, Peter! A couple more weeks and that stutter will be gone!_

Th-thanks, Moony.

**Change? What? Who? When? DETAILS PLEASE MMHMMM.**

_Yes please. Enlighten me why you were—God forbid—actually _decent _to one Lily Evans._

Well, y'see, last year…

* * *

"NO WAY!"

"Sirius!"

"Sorry Moons."

* * *

Wh-whoa…

**Took the words right out of my mouth.**

_I wish he took away some of your insanity as well._

**Ouch.**

Guys.

_I'm just saying._

Guys.

**Well you don't have to be so blunt about it!**

GUYS.

_Blunt? OH-HO-HO, look who's talking!_

GUYS! STOP ARGUING LIKE AN OLD MARRIED COUPLE AND LISTEN TO ME GODAMMIT OR I WILL SHOVE THIS QUILL SO FAR UP YOUR ASSES YOU'LL SING SOPRANO FOR A MONTH!

…

…** o_O**

D:

_Calm down, James. -_-_

**Whoa, who spat in your pumpkin juice this morning? :I**

Mr. Prongs would like to remind the two squabbling canines that if they do not help Mr. Prongs in the Endeavor to Claim Lily's Heart #257,542,976,552,505,890 I will personally shove them into Snape's cauldron next Potions class we have.

**You dare threaten me, the great Mr. Padfoot?**

_Fine, James. Now what do you want us to d—oh there you were! I wondered where that chocolate bar I was eating last class had gotten to!_

**Alright Moony's a lost cause now. He found the chocolate I hid in my bag.**

*sigh* Damn werewolf chocolate obsessions.

**Alright. Starting lunch, we'll discuss ECLH #too lazy to write down.**

_Whoa WTF why does it smell like wet do—SIRIUS!_

**Hey look class is over! Gotta run!**

* * *

"SIRIUS BLACK GET YOUR SORRY BEHIND BACK HERE RIGHT THIS INSTANT!"

"NO CAN DO, _MOM!_"

"_MOM?_ _SIRIUS ORION BLACK YOU ARE DEAD!_"

"C'mon Wormtail. Let us pray for the life of one Mr. Padfoot."

"What life? As soon as he stole Moony's chocolate, he forfeited all rights to living!"

"Your wisdom truly amazes me."

* * *

**Written in 30 minutes because I was listening to K-POP. XD**

**R&R please :3**


End file.
